This internship has been absolutely phenomenal. Not only have I been living in community with solid men and women, but I have been absolutely ROCKED by the Gospel.
Here is the best way to describe it. Before coming out here, I knew the Gospel. I knew that it speaks to my whole life. I knew that it is the A-Z of Christianity (and NOT the starting point from which I move onto more “complex” or “weighty” doctrine). I knew that it is the whole point of the Bible. I knew that everyday, my mind is to dwell on the Gospel.
I had no idea what that looked like. I did not see “legs” on the Gospel that made it apply everyday.
Soma has given legs to the Gospel. So in my mind, everything has changed. It is remarkable to see how the Gospel is fused into my everyday life. And I am not over-exaggerating here.
Example. This whole summer, we have been working on a house. Jeff Vanderstelt has been putting us interns to work. We have been painting, landscaping, and generally fixing up some of the houses owned by Jeff. It was INCREDIBLY frustrating at first.
I got frustrated at the other interns, who were not doing the job “right”. I was also frustrated at the fact that I was working on a house instead of having fun eating frozen yogurt (I love froyo!) or playing ultimate. That manifested itself in me being short (downright rude) with the other interns and that weird grumbling we do when we don’t feel like doing something but our Christian “duty” compels us. My heart was not at ALL in it.
So what was happening in that moment? It is not just my circumstances. They don’t need to change. What has happened in that moment is my control issues are being stirred up. What was in my heart is only being revealed not created by my circumstances. The problem is my heart not the house.
So the Gospel informs that! The Gospel says that I don’t have to be in control. It shows that I believe that I am the Sovereign one who should be delegating to the other interns. So instead of dying to myself, as Christ did, I believe that I deserve more and in fact elevate myself.
Because of the cross of Christ I am saved from my arrogant hierarchy seeking and need for control and saved to joyful submission and continually seeking humility. By the cross of Christ I am set free from my chains of control and am free to serve well even in the face of poor leadership (not that the interns were leading poorly). In the Gospel I am declared to be a child of God first and therefore a servant.
See what happened? I saw that the Gospel changed my heart. In that changed heart I can now serve well and seek joy in that. This is not a one time deal but a continual seeking of repentance and turning to the Gospel to find my identity, value, worth.
So this internship has been groundbreaking. I praise God that He has been faithful to reveal this to me. I have less than a week left (I board a plane this coming Monday) and reflecting back, this has been absolutely trajectory re-setting.
Thank you for your prayers and support. I am amazingly blessed to be supported by you.